The Norsemen had a theory 
That on a warrior's death 
He was flung up to Vahalla 
On his last expiring breath. 
And there he met the Valkyries 
Careening through the sky. 
Ah-if Harlow were a Valkyrie 
I'd toss my shield and die! 

The Islamatic theory is 
A pearl without a price. 
The ultimate in heavens, 
A soldier's paradise 
Where, beside a stream of liquor 
The golden maidens lie. 
Ah-if Harlow were a Houri 
I'd run amok and die! 

The Christian heaven offers 
A most exquisite land 
All marble, gold and halos 
A harp in every hand. 
The angels there in Heaven 
Are pure and white and neat. 
Ah-if Harlow were an angel 
I'm sure we'd never meet! 

         TenEyck Van Deusen