Richard C. Monnier

Date Unknown

My Dearest Mary,

I just talked to your mother, the effects of which I don't know and greatly fear. I can't tell you that I did what was right, but only that I did what I thought best.

She called and asked where, or if I knew where, you were. I was taken by surprise and didn't know what to say. The conversation wasn't long, but I could tell that I had to say more than nothing. So I called her back to explain.

I was worried that she would find out from you in any event. What good would my living be then - to have your mother dislike and distrust me. TO have her wish me to stop seeing you. I tell you and swear that neither hell nor the very bonds of life should stop me [seeing you], but only your words. These alone I fear. I fear because I love you. I would lie to God and outwit the devil if I thought that in the end it would be good for you. I can only do what I think right, for I know nothing else, and the right is hard to know.

I'm sorry that I'm not more clever.

Mother was reasonably enough suspicious of the time I spent with Richard. I was, after all, still in high school. She did stop us from seeing one another at one time, and we met secretly through that time. Richard put a lot of effort into mother and I can remember walks in the evening where mother and Richard walked in front, and I behind. Actually, I can remember a lot of evenings like that with a lot of different gentlemen. Mother was the most interesting - and best - person I ever knew. And others, too, recognized the beauty of her soul.

When I Was 17    
    Love Letters
    A Young Married Lady

NJ Governor
Lewis Morris


Henry Livingston
Night Before Xmas
Henry Livingston

Lincoln Trial
Judge Advocate
Henry L. Burnett

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